sebacious(the real song)

I'm physically busting at the seams
from the 22 years of eating
they shovel in the grief
and I swallow and gorge politely
I'm physically making myself sick
pale skin as torn and green as my eyes
I want to push the plate away
but I keep waiting for seconds
Give me strength whoever is in control
Am I waiting for no one? Am I just weak?
I'm emotionally vacant forever
suspended and detached from life
I can only dream of ordinary
and speculate what you feel like
I'm emotionally stale like sun fried grass
a canopy for the living
if I had a chance to breathe
I wouldn't know what to do with it
Give me strength whoever is in control
Am I waiting for no one? Am I just weak?
Defamation at my chubby finger tips